Thursday, May 26, 2016

Another blog about nothing...

This month’s “blog about nothing” is being brought to you by Mental Drain-O….the feeling you get when there’s just a week until the end of a long school year and it takes every ounce of your power to…..see what I mean?  I can’t even come up with an ending for…..ugh, this could be a tough job.

**I just watched a little bit of the Toronto-Cleveland basketball game until the Cavs got up by 30 in the first half.  (I’ve tried really hard to make a witty observation about Toronto’s lousy shooting somehow being connected to the currency exchange rate…no luck)  Two observations kept spinning through my head:  1) I still find it really funny that the Raptors are so-named because of Jurassic Park dinosaurs, and that they used a dinosaur as a mascot until someone politely informed the team that a raptor is a bird of prey.   Now they just use a big scaly claw or a freaky garden rake or something.  2) Lebron gets all the commercials and Steph gets all the headlines, but during these playoffs I’ve been reminded that the two players I’d most want on a team I was starting from scratch both play in Oklahoma.  You can keep your King James and your Splash Brother – I’ll take Kevin Durant and Russell Westbrook any day.  We’ll be the “D-Wrecks”, and we’ll have a pink dinosaur for a mascot.

**I’m writing this tonight because I have to write out some graduation cards tomorrow.  How come greeting cards aren’t more honest?  Instead of “Best Wishes” to a graduate why not “Enjoy your last days out of debt.”?  Or “If you thought high school was hard….you have no chance at a college degree.”  How about “You made it!  We’re as stunned as you are.”  Or for birthdays, why not “I can’t believe you’re another year older.  You looked ready to die about four months ago.”  For the new parents:  “It’s a good thing that kid will fill your hearts with love, ‘cause it’s gonna empty your fridge, bank accounts, and accumulated sick days.”  Honest sympathy cards would be nice:  “So sorry he/she is gone.  We really hoped you would go first.”  I won’t quit my day job.  (oooo, one more:  “I bet you’re mad about getting fired this week so I could make up for the bet I lost about you getting fired last week.”)

**There’s a robin nesting on the patio lights above my patio door, a mourning dove doing the same in my patio fence, a wren (I think) is nesting in both of the bird houses (and that’s not easy to do) inside the patio, and now a young rabbit has decided to live inside the drain pipe of my gutter downspout.  You wouldn’t believe the commotion when I step out the door – wings and chirps and banging metal.  The birds sit in the trees and scold me, the rabbit whimpers inside the pipe.  I feel like an intruder.  Oh, and do any of you readers have a decent rabbit stew recipe?

**Daughter 2 went to a Walking Dead convention today and suddenly, by golly, a Minnesota Twins game broke out!  Her favorite player (Brian “I’m gonna pull every ball you throw to me even if you pitch me outside and put all seven fielders to the left of second base” Dozier) hit a homer, hot dogs were only a dollar (so she bought cotton candy, lemonade, and a water), and she got to see a team score fewer runs than the Twins.  Hearing the excitement in her voice as we talked about her day was one of those cool moments of parenting…even though she didn’t follow my instructions to boo loudly and early and often.


That’s enough nothingness for this month.  Thanks for reading…and patiently waiting for a real topic to appear.

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